“My son Kevin is forever thirty-eight years old.
He/we, I say that like that because he did not suffer alone, he told me he had a drug problem and I made it my problem too, so we both fought it, for 20 years. Rehabs, programs, jail, love, you name it and it’s not ever more serious than the drug. To be fair, Kevin had medical issues upon birth which required surgeries, abdominal, which take a while to heal and are more painful, which now that I look back (I hate knowing this now) those surgeries were the beginning of the end for Kevin. His body liked the drugs, and he hated them. Of course later in his late 20’s he could no longer get those pain meds and switched to heroin.
I was a single parent, and it was just Kevin and I until he was 13, then I was pregnant with his first sibling (and only now), he was over-joyed to say the least. One of my favorite memories is when I brought his little sister home from the hospital, he scooped her from my arms and cradled her all afternoon and night. Every day he flew home from school to be with her and she adored him, and always has. She misses her big brother, her comfort in the storm, her big strong man, her best friend, she misses him sooooo much.
What drove my son every day of his life was his undying love for his family and his friends, and his fellow man. He gave the shirt off his back, his last dollar, everything he had if you needed it. If your car broke down in the middle of the night, you called my son, then he woke me up to drive him and his tools to wherever you were and he never took a dime from anyone doing that, he’d always say, “no way man, you’re going to need that cash for more parts”, and “no thanks, just do a favor for someone else sometime in my name”.
He was the funniest man on any job site, you could hear people laughing all the time at work, he was goofy, and he hated seeing anyone in a bad mood so he kept the laughs going.
He lived every day as if it were his last, he tried to be happy every day, he always called in the morning (he knew I was terrified if I didn’t hear from him by 10) and he called every night to say goodnight, even into his late 30’s. He loved/loves his family.
I was fortunate to convince him to move in with me for the last almost 2 years of his life. His little sister was in college and moved out so he moved in and we had the best 2 years since his childhood. He had me laughing so hard every day, he helped me with everything, he fixed everything, he stood up for me, and he had my back. As I had his. Although (hauntingly now that I think about it) he would tell me “I’m going to have to die before you Mom, because I can’t live without you.” I guess those words are true now.
He did not die at home, I guess in some respect I should be grateful for that. He was going out, on a date, he was thrilled because the young lady was 26 years old and him being 38, he thought he was the stud. He got all dressed up, got a haircut, shaved, and told me he loved me and would call me if he wasn’t coming home. I never received any call.
My Kevin, he was loyal, smart, funny, loving, grateful, empathetic, a best friend, a best brother, the best son, and our personal hero.”
Written by Gail Mathews